You Have To Break A Few Eggs To Make An Omelette!

I have always been a peace keeper… It’s just so much easier! Everyone likes you! Life is good……… But do you actually get what you want? Chances are you don’t, I have always found myself sacrificing my opinion, sitting on the fence, always thinking about other peoples feelings which isn’t always a bad thing.

Funny thing is when I was younger I was always the loudmouth, making people either laugh or cry but I think over time I learnt to conceal this side of me which in all honesty I kinda miss.

I remember in my psychology for managers module at University we studied a theory on the team building process:

The Forming

Storming

Norming

and performing stages

(Created by Tuckman its worth a look!)

The storming stage is where the conflict happens and I don’t know about you but that seems extremely early in the process. In reflection, people need to know where they stand extremely early on whether it be your partner, friends or work colleagues. If people know where they stand with you it gives them an indicator on how much energy they should invest in you and visa versa.

We have all been there as guys you meet a really nice girl you go on a couple dates and then things get distant.I always get super pissed off when that happens i’m sure all you guys out there do too! I’d much prefer a girl to say yeah we can go on a date and see what happens but if not I doubt you’ll see me again. I would respect that SOOO much!  Or a simple I’m not interested.

HOWEVER…. I think I have had a part to play in this too and I’m sure many of you lot have as well very much unconsciously though. In our attempt to impress we forget about are own expectations and don’t make them clear. There comes a time when enough is enough. The only way change will come is by truly and I mean truly speaking your mind whether it’s bad or good. In this clarity I strongly believe your life will flourish so whether it be a friend that always bails tell them your not going to put up with it; or your lazy ass brother who always leaves the place in a mess tell him to SORT IT OUT!

Remember! This blog is all about positivity but as the title says!

 

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Trust In The Path You Walk

Trusting in yourself and the path you walk can be a tricky thing especially if you’re going through a tricky time. Challenges arise in life it’s just a part of it, once you get that into your head you approach them differently. I strongly believe we go through things for reasons, whether that is to prepare us for a harsher challenge down the road or to make our near successes sweeter. Achieving things without tough times doesn’t make the success feel better inevitably it makes it substandard.

I have now developed a strong trust in myself which I am extremely proud of. I don’t think I’m perfect I know I will make mistakes but I trust in my ability to overcome them! I sit back sometimes and reflect on my life and think about what I have been through, what I have overcome and were I am heading. Even when I think about the bad mistakes I’ve made I always think to myself it’s irrelevant, I’m here in this present time and I have the power to make those changes TODAY!

A big portion of our time is spent questioning why we are in this situation but at the end of the day you are and you can either keep questioning it or trust in your ability to deal with it!

JUMP MAYNE!

It’s Not About The Cards Your Dealt But How Your Playing Your Cards!

Choices, choices choices! Don’t be a passenger in life learn to drive! Feeling helpless is a lack of control however you are in control you just don’t know it yet!

Everyone has 24hrs in a day equally the only difference between us is the way we spend our time due to the choices we make. There is a lot of power in realising that we are in charge of our own lives and our level of happiness.

Too often I have waited for big things in my life to occur like a holiday or graduation or getting a new job to be happy. I think the secret here is that happiness should be an everyday thing. It shouldn’t just be when something major in your life happens because they don’t come around quick enough, you’ll always be miserable.

Im CHOOSING HAPPINESS!

I think that simply trying to be happy is a great step towards increasing your happiness. I recently read, “Motivation is more of a result of doing something than it is a source to pull.” This made great sense for me and was a real eye opener! Too many times I have sat there thinking I can’t be bothered I have no motivation at all I just don’t feel good today I’ll start tomorrow (Never happens). This is where I’ve been going wrong all along! We are creatures of habit; this can be a gift or a curse. Making the first few steps towards what your trying to achieve provides the motivation you need to succeed it won’t just come to you miraculously.

Feeling like we have no control over out life leads to negative choices always remember you have a choice it’s just up to you to make the ones that make you the happiest & make a habit of it!

 

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Scars Will Scab

 

What cripples us most in the face of uncertainty?

For me personally and many others I’m sure it is the fear of being judged. Where does this innate paranoia originate? Is it because of past negative experiences? Part of it probably is but ask yourself: Where has the fear of being judged got me? Has it ever resulted in a positive outcome? The chances are it has never ever done that for you.  The worst part about the fear of other people’s judgment is that you become consumed with judging yourself, usually very harshly.

I mean this in the kindest way possible but people out there do not give a shit about the fact that you are wearing odd socks today or you approached a woman and got turned down. People are way too busy thinking about their own lives to severely worry about yours and that’s the harsh truth.

Upon reading this you may think Aaron you baldy I thought this was a blog about positivity but wait hear me out. In knowing that people do not care about you as much as you think why on earth would you care about their opinion?  It’s an extremely liberating outlook and mindset that allows you to truly express yourself without the fear of “Caring.” Taking a risk and being yourself is what life’s all about it allows you to expand your comfort zone further and further making things you used to worry about appear minor. The greatest part about being yourself is you filter out the people who you genuinely do not get along with which is not a bad thing, not everybody likes everybody!

So whether the outcome is good or bad it doesn’t matter. Nobody cares except you anyway and to be quite frank you should pat yourself on the back for being yourself. When we fear being judged it’s usually because we are allowing ourselves to be vulnerable. For some reason being vulnerable is considered weak especially amongst us men. Think of it like this, we go to the gym, lift weights to break down our muscle right? Then what do we do? We go and eat shitloads of protein. Vulnerability is our bench press and experience is our protein, whether the outcome is good or bad it will always make us stronger regardless. 

At 21 years old my hairline was a mess! I was super paranoid about it. Every time the wind blew my heart sped. It might sound really trivial to a lot of people but to me it was a huge thing. One day I woke up and said you know what Fuck it my hairline is receding and I’m going to do something about. I hopped out the barber chair a bald man and never looked back since! Sure when people I haven’t seen in a while saw me they were really shocked some liked it some didn’t but at the end of the day I liked it. It was one of the most liberating things I’ve ever done! I felt so good about myself that other people’s opinions meant nothing because I did what I wanted to do!  To be very honest people gravitate to you more when you own who you are anyway so worrying about what other people think of you is completely pointless.

I’m not saying here that nobodies opinion counts those that positively contribute to your life should be heard. But at the end of the day its your life, its 10% of what happens to us and 90% how we react to it!

 

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